Hope Deferred and Patches the Cat
My Dad has never been a fan of cats. The first cat in his house came with my Mom when he married her. There was really no choice in the matter. When Tuppins died, several years would pass before another crossed the doorstep. Through some miracle, I was able to bring home Sprite when I was in late elementary school. When Sprite swallowed a doorstop and had to be put to sleep, that was the end of housecats.
It was years later, when we built the barn, that Dobson was brought home to help with mice and play with my Mom and me. Turns out, he hasn't been the best at killing mice, but he excels at loving people. My Dad jokes that he's a good for nothing cat.
But then there was Patches, a stray that wandered into the barn at their old house and somehow found a place in my Dad's heart. I never met her, but I heard that she was scared to death of people. For a long time, you couldn't even look her in the eye. My Dad kept working with her and was finally able to pet her sometimes while she was eating. It was his goal to tame her enough that she would allow him to catch her and take her to the barn at the new house where they now live.
And he still had some time to gain her trust because the old house hasn't sold in over a year's time. Patches had lived in the barn with a few of the horses that were also left behind to make it look like there was still life around the abandoned place.
Yesterday, Mom called and told me that Dad had found Patches dead on the road earlier this week.
It made me sick to hear the news. I asked her how Dad was doing.
"It just seems like nothing's going right."
Yes, because not only has the sale of their house fallen through, but as a result of that, some animals were left behind and if they could have been moved, Patches would still be alive and she wouldn't live close to a busy road anymore. Loss of heart and loss of life would have been avoided.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick.
At Christmas time, it was all hope at our house. Mom and Dad's house would sell. Mic would find a new job and we would begin the adventure of moving to a new place. The house hasn't sold. Mic hasn't found a new job. My replacement is now three weeks into her position, leaving me in this strange place of going to a job that isn't there anymore, but that I "have for as long as I need it." Not to mention that she is so far horrible at it and I have to sit there and still let her do what should rightfully be mine. Mic worked four hours yesterday for a total of $10 in tips. Our lease is up in 60 days and we don't have anyplace to go, yet we don't want to stay.
We are sick at heart. There are still good times, but even in the laughter our hearts ache. Our hopes have been put off indefinitely. Uncertainly.
And I have to wonder when God is going to remember us. You know, the way He remembered Noah and Rachel? Like, "Oh yeah, I remember...she was praying for a baby and I haven't given it to her yet...or, that's right...I've left this guy and his family cooped up in a big boat with a bunch of stinking animals for forty days and forty nights. How could I have forgotten?"
I am waiting for God to remember, to express concern for us, to act with loving care towards us.
Before the deferring of hope dries up the wellspring of life in us and before we find anymore dreams laid to rest at the side of the road.
It was years later, when we built the barn, that Dobson was brought home to help with mice and play with my Mom and me. Turns out, he hasn't been the best at killing mice, but he excels at loving people. My Dad jokes that he's a good for nothing cat.
But then there was Patches, a stray that wandered into the barn at their old house and somehow found a place in my Dad's heart. I never met her, but I heard that she was scared to death of people. For a long time, you couldn't even look her in the eye. My Dad kept working with her and was finally able to pet her sometimes while she was eating. It was his goal to tame her enough that she would allow him to catch her and take her to the barn at the new house where they now live.
And he still had some time to gain her trust because the old house hasn't sold in over a year's time. Patches had lived in the barn with a few of the horses that were also left behind to make it look like there was still life around the abandoned place.
Yesterday, Mom called and told me that Dad had found Patches dead on the road earlier this week.
It made me sick to hear the news. I asked her how Dad was doing.
"It just seems like nothing's going right."
Yes, because not only has the sale of their house fallen through, but as a result of that, some animals were left behind and if they could have been moved, Patches would still be alive and she wouldn't live close to a busy road anymore. Loss of heart and loss of life would have been avoided.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick.
At Christmas time, it was all hope at our house. Mom and Dad's house would sell. Mic would find a new job and we would begin the adventure of moving to a new place. The house hasn't sold. Mic hasn't found a new job. My replacement is now three weeks into her position, leaving me in this strange place of going to a job that isn't there anymore, but that I "have for as long as I need it." Not to mention that she is so far horrible at it and I have to sit there and still let her do what should rightfully be mine. Mic worked four hours yesterday for a total of $10 in tips. Our lease is up in 60 days and we don't have anyplace to go, yet we don't want to stay.
We are sick at heart. There are still good times, but even in the laughter our hearts ache. Our hopes have been put off indefinitely. Uncertainly.
And I have to wonder when God is going to remember us. You know, the way He remembered Noah and Rachel? Like, "Oh yeah, I remember...she was praying for a baby and I haven't given it to her yet...or, that's right...I've left this guy and his family cooped up in a big boat with a bunch of stinking animals for forty days and forty nights. How could I have forgotten?"
I am waiting for God to remember, to express concern for us, to act with loving care towards us.
Before the deferring of hope dries up the wellspring of life in us and before we find anymore dreams laid to rest at the side of the road.
posted by Joy at
8:08 PM
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